Hello and good day!
Have you ever been standing in the shower when, out of nowhere, a song that you haven't thought of in years begins to play in your mind?
Then, for no good reason, that song occupies your thoughts for the next twenty minutes.
You hum it while you are brushing your teeth, with the white foam from the toothpaste dripping down the front of your chin.
You sing it in a whisper, under your breath, while you are sitting on the edge of your bed putting on your socks.
Somebody calls you on the phone and begins to talk, but you only halfway listen, because the song is playing on repeat alongside the voice of the person with whom you are supposedly conversing.
Thinking about the song wasn't a conscious choice.
It appeared unexpectedly and took up precious mind space more or less against your will.
I spent almost my entire life allowing fleeting thoughts to carry me away on flights of fancy.
Here is another example of this.
Two people get into an argument.
Let's say that the tiff is between a brother and a sister.
The argument could be about anything.
By way of example, it could be that the brother borrowed $500 from the sister and has not yet paid off the loan.
The sister brings it up and asks when she might expect repayment.
The brother says that he has fallen on hard times but will pay back the money as soon as he finds a new job.
Sister seems to insinuate that brother hasn't been looking hard enough for said job.
Brother takes offense to the manner and tone in which the insinuation has been expressed and an argument is off to the races.
The argument quickly reaches a stalemate with neither side willing to budge from their established position.
It is too tense to continue in the presence of one another and each removes themself from the scene of the argument.
Now each goes off on their own, to their own home, to work, to run errands, to live their life and carry out whichever activities each finds suitable.
It serves neither party to spend undue time thinking about the argument.
It doesn't help them buy groceries.
It doesn't help them do their work.
It doesn't help them to be more present in other relationships.
Quite the contrary.
Replaying the argument over and over is purely a hindrance, and it usually intensifies the feelings of ill will that each feels towards the other.
It is strange that human beings spend so much time thinking about things that they didn't choose to think about.
Here is what I never knew, or at least never really considered, until I read the book A Man's Search For Meaning by Viktor Frankl.
There are a lot of things in life that are out of our control.
You don't choose your parents.
You don't choose where you are born.
You don't choose to be bullied at school, at home, or at work.
You can't control the weather, the traffic, the news, or the economy.
If you were Jewish in Poland during the late 1930's you wouldn't have chosen to be hauled away to a concentration camp, as Viktor Frankl was.
That reality would have been imposed on you.
However, regardless of whatever is happening to you, or going on around you, you get to choose your own thoughts.
That is the key teaching from Frankl's book.
Once I figured that out, which happened just a couple of years ago, I began to experiment with this new knowledge in the shower.
I'd be in there soaping up, when out of nowhere, a song would pop into my head.
Let's just say it was Frankie Valli and the Four Seasons and the song was Can't Take My Eyes Off You.
I'd start singing to myself.
''You're just too good to be true
Can't take my eyes off of you
You'd be like Heaven to touch
I wanna hold you so much
At long last, love has arrived
And I thank God I'm alive
You're just too good to be true
Can't take my eyes off of you
And then I'd go into a round of the la di das to the tune of the song, which I am sure you can imagine, because it is a famous tune.
La da da da di da
Da da da da di da
La la la da di da
Da da da da di da
Then, I'd catch myself.
"Wait a second," I'd think.
"It doesn't serve me to keep singing this song that I didn't even choose to start singing. And it especially doesn't do me any good to la di da my way through it. Instead, I am going to think about everything good that I want to do today so that I have a better chance of achieving my goals."
And then, I'd think about my plan for the day while shaving and brushing my teeth and getting dressed and putting on my shoes.
I was able to keep my thoughts focused all the way until the time came when I could start executing on my plans.
It was easy then, because I had a very good idea about what I wanted to work on.
That was an improvement.
Furthermore, after arguments and disagreements, or any other type of tense interaction which throws me into a cycle of repetitive rehashing, I've learned to stop myself mid-thought and redirect my attention.
This has been a good thing too and has kept me from going down many negative thought spirals.
I have Viktor Frankl to thank for all of that.
Here is why I bring it up.
I can see very clearly that we are going to have some hard fighting days in front of us as a business.
The entire structure of the cacao and chocolate industry is going through an overhaul.
I don't know what the future holds.
Whatever happens on a macro scale is out of my hands.
But what we do as a company, and how we behave, is up to us and us alone.
I choose to engage in, and think about, two primary activities and I plan to direct most of my attention and energy towards these two endeavors.
Thankfully they are two things that I do pretty well when I stay focused.
I plan to fight, and I plan to write, come what may.
Nobody and nothing can stop me from doing those two things.
What do you need to dig in on?
Thank you so much for your time today.
I hope that you have a truly blessed day!
Adam
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